Walney Mosque

I had picked up from a local supermarket; my fare was a middle aged woman who started to whinge about everything and anything from the very moment she got into the taxi.
She was going to Walney island and on the way started to whinge about problems she had about the island, after a moan about the wind which is always prevalent over there she started on the subject of new folks moving on to the island. "The bloody p***i's are taking over the place" she moaned, "They are even taking over the bloody pubs," she cried.
She explained what she meant in a long racist rant which boiled down to that some Asians had taken on a local island pub the King Alfred and turned part of it into an Indian restaurant and renaming it the Mr Elephant, and then they had gone on to take over the George Hotel another island pub which has long been in decline.
Driving along Walneys promenade, she looked up towards what was a long abandoned church which has now been demolished apart from its bell tower and was covered by scaffolding.
“What are they doing there?” she asked pointing at the tower.
Instantly my evil alter ego kicked in and keeping a straight face, I lied to her that it was going to be the new mosque for all the muslins moving onto Walney.
Egged on by the look of sheer outrage on her face I went on to say that they had left the bell tower intact to convert to a minaret so that the call to prayer could be heard all over the island.

She was still muttering and plotting petitions and letters to her MP when I dropped her off ten minutes later.

I keep laughing about it every time I drive past the pretend mosque several times a day; hope she doesn’t remember me next time I pick her up eh!

Window Cleaner

I have gotten used to some of my fares taking their own sweet time coming out of their houses and getting into the Taxi that they have ordered. Usually it’s a case of not being quite ready because the cab arrived quicker than they thought. Sometimes they struggle to find keys, mobile phone, tickets etc, this is par for the course and doesn’t bother me unduly.

But today when I arrived outside the fares house bang on time was a first for me and left me slightly bewildered. My fare, a well dressed fairly normal looking woman looked out of her front door and raised one finger towards me which is the usual signal to say that she would be out in a minute or so. Imagine my surprise when she reappeared with a window cleaning squeegee and promptly started to clean her front bay window.

She rushed at it as a woman possessed and the squeegee was a blur as she washed and dried off her window in record time.

She then threw the window cleaning gear back into her house, came out, and got in the taxi.

She could see my perplexed expression and so had to give me some kind of explanation.  She said “that mucky window has been driving me mad all morning and I just couldn’t leave the house with it like that, it would have driven me mad thinking about it.”

Some folk really are a bit strange eh!

Drunken Woman

Its not that often I get out on the road these days as a taxi driver but when I do I`m always looking for something interesting.

Last night I picked 3 women up that had been to a party. It was a family party, there was mother, daughter and daughters daughter and most people can go out and have a good time and go home happy but its not always the case as there is always one who cannot handle their drink.

The middle aged woman in tha back of the car sandwiched between the other two was extremely abusive verbally to both the other passengers. Now the journey meant 3 different people being dropped off at 3 different addresses and I was just hoping the drunken woman would not be the last in case she couldnt pay the fare.

After having to listen to a torrent of four letter words and abuse from this woman directed at the other two I was glad to get to my first drop off address where one woman got out of the car followed by the abusive woman who then started shouting at the top of her voice in the street waking up residents. She was soon shoved back in the car and I carried on my journey. I had only got about 100 yards up the road when they started fighting in the back of the car.

It was at this point I stopped the car and told them both to get out. The drunken one fell out and was all over the place. the other one was very apologetic and paid the fare and so I went on my way.

What I cant understand is why people have to have stupid arguments, get aggressive and not be in control of themselves and its usually the women.

Alcohol enhances your mood so if you go out in a good mood you should in theory go home in a good mood. Unfortunatly it works the other way as well so if you go out looking for trouble then the chances are that you will find it.

Its all part of the job description these days and my main concern is for the safety of myself and other passengers as well as other road users if the vehicle is moving so by getting them out the car I think I did the right thing.