Sunday, February 6

Pen and Paper

On a wet and windy Saturday, afternoon and my fare who was a woman of a mature vintage shivered and dripped copious amounts of cold Barrow rainwater as she climbed into my cab. After the usual weather related chit chat, she declared that she had only ventured out into town in this heavy storm to buy some paper and refills for her fountain pen. Refills for a pen I exclaimed why not just buy another pen surely; they only cost a few pence. She looked horrified at the very idea and asked just when the last time that I had received a handwritten letter was. I thought about it for a minute or two and had to admit I couldn’t remember receiving one for many a year.
Come to think of it, the only items that seem to come by post nowadays are bills, computer written official letters or printed junk mail adverts. When I told her this she gave a knowing smile and asked what I do with this correspondence,” it goes straight into the shredder” I replied.  Well she says, “I have been writing to as many as thirty different folk all over the world some as far away as Australia for the last fifty years and all of them tell me that they still have every one of my letters”.   She must have seen the puzzled look on my face and as if for explanation dug into, her leather bag and pulled out a sheath of handwritten letters. Take a look at some of these she urged, and so when we pulled up outside her house I took the time to check out one or two.
The envelopes and paper used were all of the very best quality and the handwriting was absolutely superb, even though the heavy paper was unlined, every line was equally spaced and looked like a piece of artwork. Not a spelling mistake or grammar error could be seen. Wow, it was a pleasure to even look and read one of the multipage masterpieces, never mind to actually have one sent to you through the post.
I really was impressed and if a Parker fountain pen came along with a spellchecker, I may have even thought about investing in one. No, wonder her readers treasured her letters and I hope that she keeps the art of letter writing alive for many years to come.      

Friday, February 4

Concept Taxis

Take a look at this slide show of Concept New York Taxis
The Maxi addresses the very real threat of violence facing cab drivers. Says Johnson, “For the sake of exaggeration, the taxi looks impenetrable and fearsome, like a Brink’s truck.

Thursday, February 3

New York Taxi?

Is this the long awaited replacement for the iconic New York Taxi? This is one of the finalists.

Tuesday, February 1

Hello Sailor

 Spotted this one and could not resist reposting it! But really do think that there may be some truth in amongst it.
Details have been released regarding Britain's introduction of the next generation of fighting ships: The Royal Navy is proud of the cutting edge capability of the new fleet of Type 45 destroyers.
Having initially named the first two ships of this class HMS Daring and HMS Dauntless, the HM Ships naming committee have, after intensive counselling, renamed them HMS Cautious and HMS Prudence.
The final four ships are to be named HMS Empathy, HMS Nervous, HMS Timorous and HMS Apologist.
Costing £750 million, they have been designed to meet the needs of the 21st century; in addition to state of the art technology, weaponry, and guidance systems, the ships will comply with the very latest employment, equality, health & safety and human rights legislation.
They will be able to remain at sea for several months and positively bristle with facilities.
For instance, the new user-friendly crow's nest comes equipped with wheelchair access.
Live ammunition has been replaced with paintballs to reduce the risk of anyone getting hurt and to cut down on the number of compensation claims.
Stress counselors and lawyers will be on duty 24hrs a day, and each ship will have its own onboard industrial tribunal.
The crew will be 50/50 men and women, and balanced in accordance with the latest Home Office directives on race, gender, sexuality and disability.
Sailors will only have to work a maximum of 37hrs per week in line with Brussels Health & Safety rules even in wartime!
All bunks will be double occupancy, and the destroyers will all come equipped with a maternity ward and crèche, situated on the same deck as the Gay Disco.
Tobacco will be banned throughout the ship, but cannabis will be allowed in the wardroom and messes.
The Royal Navy is eager to shed its traditional reputation for "Rum, Sodomy and the lash"; out goes the occasional rum ration which is to be replaced by Perrier water, although sodomy remains: this has now been extended to include all ratings under 18.
The lash will still be available but only by request.
Condoms can be obtained from the Bosun in a variety of flavours, except Capstan Full Strength.
Saluting officers has been abolished because it is elitist, and is to be replaced by the more informal "Hello Sailor".
All notices on boards will be printed in 37 different languages and Braille.
Crew members will no longer be required to ask permission to grow beards or moustaches - this applies equally to the women.
The MOD is working on a new "Non specific" flag based on the controversial British Airways "Ethnic" tailfin design, because the white ensign is considered to be offensive to minorities.
The newly-renamed HMS Cautious is due to be re-commissioned soon in a ceremony conducted by Captain Hook from the Finsbury Park Mosque who will break a petrol bomb over the hull.
She will gently slide into the water to the tune of "In the Navy" by the Village People played by the Royal Marines.
Sea Trials are expected to take place, when she sets out on her maiden mission. She will be escorting boat loads of illegal immigrants across the channel to ports on the south coast.
The Prime Minister said that "While the ships reflected the very latest of modern thinking they were also capable of being up-graded to comply with any new legislation.
His final words were "Britain never, never waives the rules!"

Monday, January 31

Welcome Home?

At this busy junction leading onto Walney Island it is a bit of a local tradition to hang homemade banners greeting Walney residents as they arrive onto the Island. Now the usual thing we see is "happy birthday" or congratulations on a couples engagement or wedding anniversary. But the huge banner that someone had taken quite a lot of time and trouble to erect over the weekend has me baffled. It reads "welcome home Bobby K RN 2 yrs GBH.  What the heck is that all about? Are they welcoming home somebody called Bobby who has been in prison for two years for grievous bodily harm?  Or has it some other more cryptic meaning, none of my passengers seemed to know anything of it but most seemed to go along with the Bobby K getting out of prison scenario. Who knows the truth behind it eh!
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